IHOP is for lovers [ October 19, 2003, 9:55 a.m. ]

So yesterday was Love Day.. .. ..errr Sweetest Day. I had no idea until R. gave me a card and some chocolate. What did I have for him? Zilch. Arenít I romantic? Who invented Sweetest Day anyway? Donít we already have Valentineís Day? If you donít get the day off work, the holiday is a sham.

Bastards!

D. called and asked me to go to lunch and shopping. D. is a power shopper, that girl takes the phrase ďshop til you dropĒ to a whole new level. I ended up buying some new clothes. I hate clothes shopping, I hate spending money on clothes. My wardrobe consists of 2 types of clothing. Clothes I wear to work and pajamas. Iíve decided I need to change that. Iíve been trying to buy clothes the last few times Iíve gone out but I hate everything or I refuse to spend $70 on a shirt I know will shrink and wrinkle unless caught midair just as the dryer stops spinning. Ironing is a tedious chore. Blah.

The queen at Eddie Bauer latched onto me the minute I walked into the store. He tried to sell me a sweater. I mean come on. The name says it all: SWEATer. I already feel like Iím living a perpetual hot flash. Iím standing there dripping sweat and heís trying to sell me something that will only exacerbate my problem. Next he brought me some tight knit shirts that would have given me a bust you canít only achieve by appearing on Extreme Makeover. Then heís grabbing at my zippers and buttons and touching me all over. Obviously he went to the Carson Kressley School of Customer Service.

When I went to try on my clothes, he announced he had to go to the back room and Iím sure he was spying on me changing my clothes. I considered giving him a show, yanking down everything and freeballin my way through the stack of blue jeans he handed me..classic fit, loose fit, original fit.. .. ..then I thought perhaps there was a security camera and I would end up on either Rotten.com or 60 Minutes for the story about gross people freeballin in the new clothes.

I walked out with 2 shirts and a pair of pants, nothing he recommended.

Olive Garden for lunch. Iím not a big fan of Olive Garden. I can make the same meal at home and not have to sit upright or get dressed. Then Sofoís, I bought R. some Italian Wedding soup (Happy Sweetest Day!). Then a bead store. Have you ever been to a bead store? Zzzzzzzzzzz. A pet store, a beauty supply store, picked up her husbandís new suits and then hit an artsy-fartsy floral shop. Whew..too much too much.

Thereís no place like home.

Later R. and I went to IHOP for dinner, because we enjoy fine dining. There was a woman complaining ďIím a very picky eater, I didnít care for the meatloaf and I donít like gravy.Ē The woman looked as if she drank gravy for breakfast lunch and dinner. She could barely fit in the booth, her breast overflowed onto the table. Who the hell is she kidding?

Today I get to clean up the yard and put away all the pots and such for winter. Itís not as much fun tearing everything down as it is putting it all together.

Iím gonna sit on my good news another day or two. Canít jinx it.

This is my 400th entry.



And you thought weíd never last.

::kisses Lisa Marie::



Now Playing: "Discotheque" U2

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